When Things Are Feeling "Off"

"I'm not feeling very festive..."

That's what I said to our friends over dinner last weekend. 

Things were chaotic, as they are with 5 young kids who need food cut, cups filled, and the reminder to not tell potty jokes while we're eating!

In between the interruptions, we talked about our holiday plans and preparations and it was reassuring to hear that we aren't the only ones thinking about how to do less this year. 

But even with that intentional choice to dial things back to a manageable pace, I couldn't shake the uncomfortable feeling of change from the norm.

So I confessed, with a sigh...

"I'm just not feeling very festive this year."

And our friends, trying to make me feel better, said, "But your house looks great. It's SO festive!".

I smiled and thanked them because it's true. My house does look pretty festive. 

Our tree is fully decorated, the Christmas village is on the mantel, nutcrackers are on display, and we have garland and lights on the front porch.

But just because my house has twinkle lights and garland doesn't mean that I feel festive.

Looks can be deceiving.

It's the same with my client who has a planner that's perfectly neat and organized and yet she still feels overwhelmed and stretched thin behind the scenes.

So the question is why?

If things look acceptable, or even great from the outside, why don't you feel that way too?

Isn't that the whole point of decorating or maintaining a planner? To create an environment that makes you feel how you want to feel?

It's only part of the story

For me and my holiday spirit, I realized that despite my decorations, I wasn't feeling festive because I was using a definition of "festive" that I had outgrown. 

Festive isn't about how much holiday stuff I DO or what is happening AROUND me. It's about slowing down and being present enough to create and witness my own magic and excitement. 

For my client, it wasn't about how organized her appointments and tasks were. It was realizing that her priorities weren't reflected in her planner and that ultimately she is the one who decides how much is enough. 

Are you in alignment?

If you have an area of your life that looks great from the outside but feels "off" behind the scenes, pay attention to that alert. 

How great that you are noticing the discrepancy now so you can do something about it?! 

Then ask yourself why?

• Are you measuring yourself against someone else's standards?

• Are you using an outdated example of what something "should" be?

• Or have you just not decided what it is that you actually want?
  

I'm so glad that my friends said what they said to me. If they hadn't, I may have never realized that I am actually feeling festive. I'm just feeling festive in a different way than I have in years past.

How are you feeling this time of year? Are you redefining anything for yourself or your family? I would love to hear.