What a Working Mom Looks Like

I’ll never forget this conversation I had years ago at a celebratory happy hour in my pre-kid days (remember those?).

I had just met this woman. She was several years ahead of me professionally and had the type of career that I dreamed of having for myself one day. She was poised, articulate, stylish, and interesting. I thoroughly enjoyed talking with her.

We were deep into our conversation when, for the first time, she casually mentioned her son.

Screech… I did not see that coming! (And I see now how this just highlights my conditioning and how I was socialized to view career women, eek.)

Turned out she actually had two kids, both in high school. (Which could explain how at ease she was as compared with having littles who desperately need you most during typical happy hour time.)

I distinctly remember feeling challenged in my thinking as a young professional, with preconceived notions of what a mom of school-aged kids looked like. I was impressed at her ability to have both - school-aged kids and a successful career.

But mostly I was impressed that she had so much to talk about. It was clear that she had interests and an identity in addition to motherhood.

I thought if this is what being a mom can look like then that’s something I could get on board with.

Up until then, I didn’t know what it would look like or how anyone could do it. (As a teacher, my mom worked but kept the same hours as me and my sister.)

This woman showed me an example of what’s possible.

I tell this story because it’s one of those experiences that fuels me in my purpose as a working mom. To show what’s possible to as many different people as possible.

It's all too easy to surround yourself only with people like you. To go to meet-ups and coffee dates with other working moms.

Don't get me wrong, those connections are crucial. They are your people. The ones who get it in a way that few others will.

But it's also important to spend time in the company of other professionals who aren't moms - or at least aren’t wearing their “mom hat” first.

Not only does it stretch you, it also provides the opportunity to show them what a working mom can look like. To perhaps change their preconceived notions, just like that woman did for me all those years ago.

Engage in those conversations. Flex your I-have-interests-outside-of-motherhood muscles. And then mention that you’re also an amazing mom with amazing kids.

I'm proud of my kids. I'm also proud of who I am and what I do.

Being a mom is my superpower. It makes everything else that I do better. And I want to be an example of what’s possible because of motherhood, not in spite of it.

Do you have an example in your own life of what’s possible as a working mom? Or…

Are you that example for someone else?

Think about it.

Then let me know.