Quantity versus Quality Time with Your Kids

When you plan an activity or outing, do you think ahead to the memory it will create?

It's kind of like taking a picture to capture a moment so you can have physical evidence to go along with the memory.

I love looking back at photos from years past and being reminded of all of the things that we did, the places we visited, and the milestones we crossed. And...

I want to remind you that those memories also happen in the little things as well.

You may not have an external indicator, like the event you're attending, the lost tooth your kid is holding, or the new city you're visiting, but you'll know those everyday memories are being created if you look for them.

I call them a freeze-frame moment.

It's a moment where you're both in the moment AND watching the moment.

It sounds crazy, I know, but you know when you're having one. Trust me.

When I think back to some of my strongest memories as an adult, many of them were freeze-frame moments. Times when things were good, and I knew they were good.

Take the other night: I was standing in the kitchen washing dishes after dinner. We had music playing and my husband and the kids were getting their groove on. There was so much laughing and singing and hip-shaking (mine included) and all I was thinking was life is good. Despite the illnesses, the stress, the tantrums, and the challenging times, this moment is good.

I was soaking up everything about the scene while also looking in on it, capturing it all, and filing it away for the future. For a day when things maybe don't feel as good.

That's the other thing about freeze-frame moments - they typically involve regular, nothing-special, daily-life moments. They're rarely moments when I've planned some picture-perfect outing or when I feel like I'm being a "Pinterest mom".

And that's actually what makes them so special. You have no expectations that they will be an amazing memory so they have every opportunity to surprise and delight you.

WHAT REALLY MATTERS

I read lots of articles about the quantity of time versus the quality of time with your kids. About staying at home versus working.

And what I've realized from my own freeze-frame moments is, it doesn't really matter.

What matters is that you're present in THE moments of your life with your kids. That you're in those moments so deeply that you're unlikely to forget them. So that when things don't feel as good, you can draw on your freeze-frame moments to get you through.

My group program Beyond Balance will help you create more space in your days so that you can be more present and drop in more deeply to the everyday memories you're creating. If you want more of that, put your name on the waitlist to be the first to hear when enrollment opens.