As a working mom, it’s easy to get caught up in the hustle of daily life, rushing from one task to the next, juggling multiple roles, and striving to do it all. But what if I told you that one of the most powerful tools you can use to enhance your productivity, improve your relationships, and reduce stress is simply saying less?

In a world that’s always loud—whether it’s the constant chatter of work, social media, or family demands—learning to pause, slow down, and embrace silence can have a profound impact on your personal and professional life.

The Power of the Pause: Giving Yourself Permission to Stop

In our busy, often frantic lives, pausing can be hard. It seem counterintuitive when we’re constantly told to be more productive, more efficient, and to never stop moving forward.

Learning to pause—whether in conversations, before you make decisions, or as you're moving throughout your day—is the secret to feeling more content. When you give yourself the space to stop and reflect before responding, you give yourself the opportunity to make more thoughtful decisions, prioritize better, and ultimately reduce stress. The act of pausing can help you assess what really matters, not just in your work, but in your life as a whole.

The Silent Power of Negotiation: A Case Study in Career Decisions

Let me share an example from one of my recent client sessions to illustrate how impactful it can be to say less. This client was grappling with whether to stay in her current job or make a change. She was feeling stuck, unsure if staying was the right choice, but also hesitant to jump into a new role without knowing exactly what she wanted to do next and if another job would actually be any better.

During our sessions, we explored what she truly wanted in her work life, what boundaries she would need to set, and how she could advocate for herself in a way that wouldn’t lead to burnout. While she explored other potential opportunities, she also prepared for an important conversation with her manager to reset boundaries.

In negotiations or any important conversation, sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is say what you need to say and then stop talking. To speak and then pause.

Why? Because silence is powerful. If you state your case clearly, without over-explaining or justifying, the silence that follows gives the other person the chance to reflect on what you’ve said. Silence allows your words to land with more of an impact and it gives the other person space to process. Often what happens, is they will fill the silence with their own response. And that gives you valuable insights into their perspective.

Embracing Silence as a Leader: One Client’s Transformation

Silence doesn’t just work in negotiations —it can be transformative in leadership too. One of my clients, who had recently stepped into a bigger leadership role, found herself falling into an old habit of talking too much during meetings with her team. She thought leadership meant always providing answers, offering guidance, and being the expert. However, she soon realized that the best leaders often say less and listen more.

By learning to pause in her one-on-one meetings with her team, she created space for her direct reports to share their thoughts, ideas, and concerns. This shift allowed her to understand her team better, build stronger relationships, and create a more open and supportive work environment. Over time, saying less became the foundation of her leadership style, strengthening her team’s trust and communication.

Applying the Pause to Parenting: A Personal Example

The power of saying less isn’t limited to work-related conversations. It can also make a huge difference in how we interact with our kids. I was recently inspired by a video from Dr. Becky Kennedy, who shared an insightful example from her own parenting experience. Her son was upset because he wanted to wear his favorite sweatshirt to school but it was still dirty. Instead of jumping in to defend herself or explain why it was actually his fault the shirt wasn't clean, she chose to say less.

Instead of adding fuel to the fire, she simply acknowledged his disappointment with a quiet, “Yeah, you wanted to wear your favorite sweatshirt today.” By saying less and allowing the silence to fill the space, she de-escalated the situation, allowing her son to move on minimal frustration.

In parenting, we often feel the need to explain, justify, or solve problems immediately. But sometimes, saying less can actually diffuse a potential conflict. Just like in work situations, silence can give both you and your child the opportunity to process feelings and move forward more calmly.

How to Practice Saying Less in Your Own Life

So how can you start practicing saying less? The first step is to notice when you tend to over-talk or fill the silence. Is it at work, during meetings with colleagues or your manager? Is it with your kids when they’re upset or asking questions? Or perhaps in your personal relationships, when you feel the need to explain or justify yourself?

For me, I’ve found that I’m much more comfortable practicing silence in professional conversations. However, in my parenting, I often feel compelled to explain myself or offer solutions, even when it’s not necessary. By being more aware of these tendencies, I can challenge myself to say less in those moments.

Start by practicing in small ways. For instance, during a conversation at work, try to pause after making a point. Allow a few seconds of silence to give your words space to resonate. In your personal life, resist the urge to immediately solve a problem for your child or partner and instead, offer a simple acknowledgment.

The goal is not to eliminate communication, but to create space for deeper, more thoughtful exchanges. Just like those powerful TED talk speakers who pause after delivering a key point, your words will carry more weight when you give them room to breathe.

Connecting It All Together

The benefits of saying less extend far beyond just reducing the noise in your life. When you say less, you also do less. You create more time and space to focus on what really matters, both at work and at home. This practice is particularly important for working moms, who often find themselves juggling multiple responsibilities and feeling like they have to be everywhere at once.

Saying less can also lead to clearer boundaries. When you stop over-explaining or justifying yourself, you reinforce your needs and expectations without feeling the pressure to accommodate everyone else. This is essential in both professional and personal contexts, where you might be tempted to say yes to everything out of fear of disappointing others.

In the end, the practice of pausing and saying less isn’t just about being more efficient—it’s about being more intentional with your time, your words, and your energy. By learning to embrace silence, you’ll create more meaningful connections, foster better communication, and, ultimately, find more peace in your life.

Ready to Practice Saying Less?

If you’re ready to start practicing the art of saying less and pausing more, I invite you to join my small group coaching program for working moms. Together, we’ll learn how to manage your time more effectively, reduce overwhelm, and focus on what’s most important in both your personal and professional life.

The program is designed to help you find time for the things you’ve been putting off, whether it’s focusing on self-care, building better boundaries, or exploring new career opportunities.